Help your child to develop healthy self-esteem
아이가 건강한 자존감을 가질 수 있도록 도와주세요
Photo 3-239. Children who are raised with enough true unconditional love not only love themselves but also others and do their best in whatever they do. From an early age, she has been growing with sound healthy self-esteem and pride, and confidence.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
Who is a successful person?
Parents and siblings are harmonious and comfortable, looking up to the sky, and looking around the world, without shame, being gentle, good, polite, humble, living in humility, raising children so that they can be part of a productive society with sound healthy self-esteem and pride, and love while helping others.
Can you define a successful person if you live while living, have abundant food, clothing, and comfortable shelter in your life, healthy, and productive in this world?
I wonder how many such people are in this world.
All parents desperately want their precious children to have a successful life.
But being successful is not that easy.
Looking at the entire life of “successful people”, they have one or two things in common for their success.
They were healthy, had smart brains from their birth, studied hard, did their best in whatever they did, had good interpersonal relationships, and when they did something, they had a good plan before starting and did it well systematically.
He went ahead and ended it successfully,
He set his priorities in his life well and did his job well according to those priorities.
On top of that, not only have they have received unconditional and genuine love from their parents during their growth, they will continue to be loved by their parents and continue to learn to love their spouse, children, and others even after adulthood, and they will have a wealth of financial and sound healthy self-esteem and pride.
It is true.
It’s easy to understand how important it is for growing children to have a lot of healthy self-esteem and pride.
How much you have a healthy self-esteem and pride determines whether you can succeed in this world or not.
The children raised up with genuine, unconditional love from their parents have healthy self-esteem and pride and strength, and they grow up happily.
Parents have so many things to do with their children from an early age to help them succeed with a lot of healthy self-esteem and pride.
The most important thing among them is to give enough true love without conditions.
Parents need to fill their children ‘s love tanks thoroughly, training them with loving eye contact love, proper physical contact love focused attention love and care, and love.
Only then, from birth to newborn, infancy, school age, puberty, and adulthood, knows how to love others with healthy self-esteem and pride, and is loved by others, and is not afraid when faced with new or difficult tasks.
People with healthy self-esteem and pride can lead a beautiful life, live politely and humbly, and lead a successful life.
For this reason, parents should teach their children how to live with an abundance of healthy self-esteem and pride. Raise your children so that they have healthy self-esteem and pride.
Photo 3-240. A child who has grown up receiving enough love for eye contact, physical contact, and true unconditional love not only loves himself but also loves others and does his best in whatever he does. From an early age, she lived with healthy self-esteem, pride, and confidence.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
It is pride to think, evaluate, feel, and evaluate one’s own values and abilities soundly and highly.
Because everyone has healthy self-esteem and pride, they say that there is an existence called “I” and “I am an unparalleled being in this world”.
Having this healthy self-esteem and pride is very important in the lives of children and adults.
Your success in your life can be determined by how much and how powerful you are with healthy self-esteem and pride.
Still, many people live without knowing what healthy self-esteem is.
Children with an abundance of healthy self-esteem know how to love others and receive more love from others.
Healthy self-esteem is a must-have in life.
Having an abundance of healthy self-esteem creates a sense of security in his life by doing his best in whatever he does.
They are not afraid or afraid when I run into new things.
It is common to have a firm mind to solve the new problem and naturally take an attitude to solve the new problem.
On the contrary, people who have unhealthy or damaged self-esteem, who have impaired self-esteem, or who do not have healthy self-esteem, neither know how to love others nor receive love from others.
They are helpless in their daily activities, fear of dealing with strangers, fear of starting new things spontaneously, they can start, but the process of continuing the work can seem awkward.
The efficiency and achievement of school study depend on how rich healthy self-esteem is. It also greatly affects the degree of growth and maturity. It has a lot of influence on establishing close relationships with peers and friends and having interpersonal relationships with other people.
Photo 3-241. A child who has been brought up with plenty of eye contact love, physical contact love, and unconditional true love grows up with good eye contact and healthy self-esteem and confidence from an early age.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
Not only that, but healthy self-esteem has a great influence on setting the direction of a healthy life.
It is common for children to develop these ups and downs of self-esteem normally.
The pride of infant children who grew up receiving enough true unconditional love from their parents is strong.
So they see, touch, feel, think about things around them, and learn from them by feeling what they are.
School-age children and adolescent children with healthy sound self-esteem are not afraid to deal with strangers, are not very suspicious of them, accept them easily, and treat them comfortably. If you have questions about what you feel and think, you tend to ask questions without hesitation and try to find out more.
They are very curious.
It is a personality that is commonly seen in school-age children, adolescent children, and adults with healthy self-esteem.
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As they grow up and develop and reach school age, they sometimes start to doubt the current status of one’s self-esteem at home at school and compare one’s own values and abilities with those of other peers.
Sometimes they seriously assess how valuable they are, and whether their abilities and body images are better than their peers’ values, abilities, and body images, or if they are lower than theirs. Depending on the results of the evaluation, some of them may have damaged their healthy self-esteem.
Some adolescent children see their body image negatively and their self-esteem can be damaged.
Sometimes, seeing one’s body image is a significant negative light can be embarrassing.
Some adolescent children, who grow up and develop and are sensitive to emotions, react very sensitively to each and every aspect of their body. Any part of the body that is a little bigger or even a little smaller than that of its peers hurts the trouble and healthy self-esteem. A little fat or a little slimy body can cause a lot of flexion in healthy self-esteem.
Adolescent children naturally have great power to seek independence from their parents and authorities. Such a pursuit of independence arises naturally. Because the effort to seek independence is so powerful, adolescents go anywhere alone. They also try to do something on their own without parental help.
How well adolescent children are received by their peers and friends, and how well they are accommodated, also determines the soundness of their healthy self-esteem and pride. In addition, the ability to seek independence is greatly affected by how healthy self-esteem is.
In order to help their adolescent children grow up with an abundance of healthy self-esteem, parents must also give their adolescent a lot of unconditional true love. This is because true unconditional love from parents becomes the driving force in the life of adolescent children.
Newborns, infants, school-age children, and adolescent children must grow up with true, unconditional love from their parents so that their pride is healthy and strong.
Children with strong self-esteem do their best without being afraid of whatever they do, who they meet, whatever they start with.
Photo 3-242. A child who has received enough love for eye contact and physical contact and has enough true unconditional love has good eyes and lives with healthy self-esteem and confidence from infancy. And also make good friends.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
If Children and adolescent children are raised by their parents who give possessive love, role reversal love, seductive love, vicarious love, healthy self-esteem for they do not develop If adolescent children who are conditionally loved and raised or who are raised without genuine love can dot have healthy self-esteem or their self-esteem is poor and unhealthy. They are timid and fragile, like chicks who just woke up.
Children and adolescents who grow up with the warm and loving eye contact love of their parents, warmly hug, lift, freeze, kiss, and so on children and adolescents who have been raised with full care and trained with love have good self-esteem pride even as adults.
From parents, children received possessive love, role reversal love, seductive love, vicarious love, Healthy self-esteem does not develop in adolescent children who are conditionally loved and raised or who are raised without genuine love.
Their self-esteem is poor and unhealthy.
They are timid and fragile, like chicks who just woke up.
The pride of children and adolescents who have received enough focused attention love and care while growing up, from birth to growth, is higher, more self-esteem. And it is more comfortable to communicate through conversation.
Parents should usually fill their children’s love tanks with unconditional true love. Only then will their self-esteem become healthier and stronger.
As the love received from the parents in the love tank diminishes, their healthy self-esteem and pride diminish and damages.
In this extremely turbulent world, no matter how busy they live, parents give their children plenty of true, unconditional love, and constantly fill their love tanks with eye contact love, physical contact love, and focused attention love, and care. “I love you. If you make the words louder often so that they can hear them clearly, their self-esteem becomes healthier and stronger.
Parents!
Are you raising your children that way?
Other than that, there are many more things parents need to do to help them develop strong and healthy self-esteem.
For example, even if younger children mislead teamwork in their lives, lose games, learn English at school, they are more faulty than other children, even if they don’t possess special skills, even if they don’t have one arm, you have to truly love without conditions.
For those who receive unconditional love, their healthy self-esteem and pride becomes higher and richer, and that pride becomes wholesome.
Whether you have one child, two children, or many children, whether they are girls or boys, you must truly love them without condition.
No matter what he does not achieve the best, he should love him unconditionally and do his best to compliment him without hesitation, saying, “Well done.”
They need to be praised so that their self-esteem becomes stronger and healthier.
Praising them only when they performed superlatively well will in most cases disappoint themselves and damage their image or self-esteem because they cannot do all the time best. Our parents sometimes make mistakes in this regard.다
Parents should not spare it to give proper praise even if they did not do well at the highest level.
Their parental love can be well conveyed to them by loving them verbally, through eye contact, physical contact. Such love should be given a lot and a lot every day.
It is really not easy to love and nurture children in children adolescents (0-18 years old). But what could be more unfortunate than having healthy self-respect than having poor children?
You have to pay the price.
What will the joy of having a productive, happy, and wholesome child with lots of pride compare to in this world?
Even if school-age children are not very good at drawing, they should refrain from speaking negatively about the child’s drawing or the child’s drawing.
Photo 3-243. A child who has received enough love for eye contact, love for physical contact, and true unconditional love has a good eye contact love and lives with healthy esteem and confidence from an early age. Make friends well.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
Photo 3-244. A child who has received enough r eye contact love, physical contact love, and true unconditional love has good eye contact and lives with healthy self-esteem and pride and confidence from an early age. He is well to listen and get the train well.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
Photo 3-245. A child who is raised with enough eye contact love, physical contact love, and true unconditional love has a good eye contact love and lives with healthy sound pride and confidence from an early age.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
A positive appreciation and no hesitation for other talents he has will strengthen the child’s healthy self-esteem and pride and be healthy.
When you do something in your daily life, a child who does his best and propaganda to the end must be praised and encouraged by saying, “I am proud of you,” so that he or she will have healthy self-esteem and pride.
Do not hesitate to give him water, do trivial errands, or do school homework, and he should praise him as “well done.”
Clap your hands, hug them, kiss them with good eye contact, and give them proper love through physical contact love in order to create healthy self-esteem and pride for your children.
If they humiliate them in such a way that they can’t do anything like that or can’t do anything like that at your age, their healthy self-esteem and pride is damaged and their hearts hurt.
Some of these trivial words can negatively affect your child’s life.
Parents must be extremely careful about word by word that parents have unknowingly found in parenting.
That said, you shouldn’t be complimenting too much or inappropriately.
Appropriate praise should be given according to time and place. It is appropriate to praise to saying “Good job” for school-age children who eat rice and put his rice bowl in the kitchen or clean and clean the room. It would be appropriate to praise it as “thank you.”
Only by listening to the right compliments they accept it and strengthen their self-esteem.
When he has done his best to work but haven’t finished it all or he has done something wrong, you can criticize him intermittently, but you have fully supported him.
However, accusing him of doing something wrong or repressing his child can damage his self-esteem.
In order not to make another mistake in the future, you must point out what is wrong.
Parents also need to set an example for their children so that they can correct what is wrong so that their wholesome self-esteem becomes stronger and healthier.
No matter how young a child maybe, they know whether their parents are truly helping them, sincerely commending them, or making fun of them.
He knows whether he forgives his wrongdoing or simply ignores it.
Children with an abundance of healthy self-esteem make good eye contact and grow up cheerfully with a smile when talking with others.
Children who lack self-esteem do not laugh during conversations with others, do not look at the other person with gentle and good eye contact, and may have good eye contact.
Sometimes during a conversation, he turns his gaze down, to the side, or away from him, making the person he is talking to unpleasant.
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What’s even more frightening is that the person you’re talking to is disliked during a conversation, so the person you’re talking to may mistakenly think that he is reluctant to continue the conversation because he hates him. It also hurts the pride of the person you talk to. What a miserable interpersonal relationship. It is not comfortable to have eye contact with school-age children or adolescent children who lack healthy self-esteem and ride, so it is difficult to communicate with them and make close relationships with them.
Such school-age or adolescent children are prone to unhealthy self-esteem and cannot lead to a smooth social life. Furthermore, we can understand that success in life can also be difficult. It is very important to give your children unconditional true love, but only when they are well trained with love, they will grow and develop well with a lot of healthy self-esteem and ride. You should teach them how to make good eye contact.
While growing up under the parenting, you should observe that your child has good eye contact every day, and continue to train children to have good eye contact.
You shouldn’t think that you naturally have a good look after birth.
Children who have been trained and raised in this way, even when they are young and grown-up, have good eye contact with others during conversations with others, meet and make a lot of good leaders, great teachers, and good friends, and have healthy sound pride.
It trains them to take responsibility for the actions and consequences they have done so that they have healthy self-esteem and ride.
Help your children participate in teamwork appropriate to their age and abilities and train them to do their best when doing teamwork so that their pride is healthy and strong.
During teamwork, you need to find out what happened to his positive and negative behaviors, and the consequences of those positive or negative behaviors and reinforce negative behaviors into positive behaviors and positive behaviors into more positive behaviors. This is healthy and strengthened.
Other rules of family life must be established fairly, and the family rules established once are educated to obey and trained according to those rules. If the family rules you have established are too strict for the child, or if the child is unable to act according to the rules and is too formal, or if it seems to be improperly set, it should be appropriately modified with a practical family rule to enforce.
Here, too, parents must set an example for their children and take the lead. Only in this way will your growing child’s healthy self-esteem become healthier and stronger.
“Don’t Do As I Do, Do As I Say” Parental training, such as “Do what I say, do not do what I do, but do what I say”, undermines the healthy self-esteem of their children.
What task
Teaching the habit of reading a reference book on a task before planning and carrying out a task is very important, and it teaches that if you study hard, you will get good academic results and your self-esteem will be stronger and stronger.
Teach them to speak positively, to follow proper etiquette, and to follow their teachings.
It teaches you to keep your promises and not to lie white or red, respect the opinions of others, and teach you to think reasonably, logically, and reasonably when solving something you see, hear.
It is taught that children who are trained to practice these teachings and live mildly, good, and hardworking will have wholesome and healthy self-esteem and ride.
Some parents are left to be depressed even if they do wrong behaviors that are deviating from courtesy, ethics, and morality, and not trained to behave properly.
Children who have not been lovingly trained by their parents for fear of being depressed may grow up without discerning what is right and what is wrong.
Because of that, they will not be able to develop healthy self-esteem and ride and will not be able to enjoy a successful life.
Teach moral ethics of good manners.
If you train them in an inconsistent mother-and-dad family education method where the father commands him to do this and the mother commands him to do that, their hearts, actions, and minds are confused.
Therefore, both parents must train their children uniformly.
No matter how insignificant a young child may say if the parent listens to him and listens to the end, he or she believes that his parents love and respect him. Children know well whether their parents are eager to listen to them or not. When parents listen well, his pride becomes healthier and stronger.
When a child voluntarily says how he spent the day and what happened to himself, don’t just go over it, listen to the end, be interested in what he did and what happened to him.
Be healthy.
Give the child an opportunity to present his or her opinion at a family meeting and listen to his or her opinion.
Even if you disagree with the parent’s opinion, even if the child’s opinion is wrong, respecting the child’s opinion creates healthy self-esteem and ride.
We all live in a limited time. They live 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. There are countless things to do within a given amount of time in life.
We must set priorities in life, schedule timelines according to them, and spend time appropriately for our children who are the top priorities for us.
You should spend at least 10 to 30 minutes or just a few minutes with one child 24 hours a day. While spending time with a child, you should take the opportunity to think about the problems that are happening in his life.
In this way, while parents and children spend time together, you need to give the focused attention love, and pride so that he or she can feel that he or she is the most important child in the world.
By spending time like this and giving him focused attention love and care, he can reveal to his parents his secrets that his child has deeply cherished.
It is a good opportunity to have a serious conversation between parents and children when they give such focused attention lover and care.시
By a focused attention love with him through physical contact with the warm eyes contact love of his parents, he can fill the love tank with his parents’ love, strengthen, his healthy self-esteem, and give him the power to live positively.
When a child messes with his or her room with books, paper, pencils, toys, clothes, etc., instead of training by saying “Why don’t you clean up the room” by using the subject “you”, use the subject “I” am seeing that room is unpleasant.” Or, if you train by saying “no,” it will less damage the child’s self-esteem.
When adolescents ask for their parents’ opinions about their future career choices, their self-esteem is reinforced only when they see positively about the career they choose and go in favor of the choice.
The child’s future job the parents were hoping for was to become a doctor, but when the child decides to become an elementary school teacher, he must accept the child’s future job as positively as possible and select it according to his will to help him become a teacher. Your child’s self-esteem will be healthy.
It trains them to take responsibility for the good books they need and to take care of their own possessions.
Parents should not throw away or take toys, books, or other possessions without their children’s permission.
Saying contempt, such as the fat, lean, lazy, or idiot, loser, damages his healthy self-esteem and pride. No matter how young they are, they are independent human beings. Parents cannot own children, nor are parents owned, children.
You should never force your children to obey their will just because they think they are interesting and like them.
This love is called possessive love.
This kind of love is false love and is a great cause of damage to a child’s healthy self-esteem and pride.
If they grow up with such love, they will not develop healthy self-esteem, and even a little healthy self-esteem will be greatly damaged.
When the child is planning to do something, find out if the work and plan are appropriate, and if appropriate, help him or her to perform the task successfully, and if any problems arise while doing it, work with parents as needed.
If possible, train them not to start working full of fractions and abilities from the beginning, and when doing big things, do not rush to achieve goals within a short amount of time. Teach that there is also away.
Photo 3-246. A child who is raised with enough love for eye contact, love for physical contact, and true unconditional love has a good eye contact love and lives with healthy sound pride and confidence from an early age.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
If he works without a plan and fails to complete it or fail in the middle, his healthy self-esteem can be damaged. On the contrary, the successful resolution of the task can result in healthy self-esteem and pride.
Find out what was difficult and easy to solve a task, and if you could do almost the same thing over and over again, look for other ways to do it.
When he does work, parents shouldn’t be involved from start to finish and do it entirely.
These days, about 6% of pre-adolescent school-age children and adolescent children in the United States are being treated with mental stabilizers and neuropsychiatric stimulants for attention deficit disorder, hyperactivity disorder, depression, behavioral disorder, and stress.
Teach children and adolescents how to deal with stress on their own with such problems.
Teach them how to have the power to challenge all the problems of life, and love and advocate for them without spared praise and support for their abilities.
If you feel that you are afraid of something or are incapable of doing it, do not force you to continue, but help him do other things.
Teach them to be interested in what they think he can do, out of a range of things or activities. It also encourages him to do new things that are less stressful and challenging.
If he is still under stress, help him relieve stress with physical exercise, deep breathing exercises, or other means, and parents show him how to relieve stress
The home should be the most enjoyable and comfortable haven, home, and learning place for the child.
It should be a sweet home. Nevertheless, these days, parents have a fashionable divorce, an unpleasant divorce, a divorce to live happily, a twilight divorce or a separate life, and their young children have lost their shelter.
As I planted, it is worth at least once to think about the consequences of forgetting the causal relationship and living alone after the age of 57.
Make sure you eat three meals a day regularly with balanced, nutritious foods. You get the energy and nutrients from breakfast to do your job well for the day. Therefore, it is taught that breakfast is very important for three meals a day. Do proper physical exercise regularly, teach not to smoke, and even parents do not smoke. Show and teach how to live healthily.
It teaches them to take responsibility for their actions and consequences, respect others as mine, do not disrespect children, the poor or the elderly, and do not discriminate against them. If you don’t like 3Ds work (dirty, difficult, dangerous), teach others not to do it.
Photo 3-247. Children who are raised with eye contact love, physical contact love, and true unconditional love have good eye contact love and live with healthy self-esteem and pride, and confidence from an early age.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
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It teaches how to do laundry, how to clean, how to organize bills, how to use checks (personal checks), how to throw out trash, how to cook, etc.
Teach things.
Children who are trained in this way develop healthy and healthy self-esteem and pride both mentally and physically.
If they don’t know, of course, they are afraid of everything.
It teaches that drinking, smoking, and addictive substance abuse negatively affect the body, mind, and social life in general and not be involved.
Meet and contact your child’s teachers frequently to find out how he or she is studying at school, how he or she lives and builds his or her healthy self-esteem and pride.
Have parents or only children participate in various events, sports, dramas, and concerts that take place in the area, volunteer, and develop healthy pride through other extracurricular activities.
The environment and conditions of the study room are appropriately created so that students can study hard, and they regularly do homework, preparation, and review at a certain time, and when they study, they help answer questions within a certain limit but do not do their homework instead of children. It teaches the way to study voluntarily rather than studying at the academy.
Let your children learn and develop healthy self-esteem at the library, at secondary school or college, or at Sunday school.
Never say anything that compares to his or her brothers, sisters, relatives, or neighbors.
Comparing your children to other children suggests that they are better than you and that you are worse than them. How bad will your heart be and his healthy self-esteem and pride will be damaged?
Assuming that the child is incapable of doing so, parents should not do his job all over for him.
There are many things the child can do on his or her own without parental help. Parents often conclude that he can’t do it and without having to get started. Some parents force adult sons and daughters to do this, even after they become adults.
Suppose that you grew up having never done anything yourself. What grief for this.
Can you find healthy self-esteem and pride in adults who grew up tied to the parenting of such parents?
How can a child raised under such parents go through the world alone and have sound pride?
It enhances their self-esteem by teaching them where their ancestors’ roots came from and to feel good in their roots.
Rich and healthy self-esteem is essential for children’s growth and development and success, and positively affects daily life at home or school, and positively affects school study, athletic ability, and relationships with peers. It is easy to see how important parental love is.
In addition, healthy self-esteem gives you a wealth of ability to keep yourself away from smoking, substance abuse, alcohol, and teenage pregnancy, and to challenge yourself to do something soundly, and it influences you to develop an amicable personality and to judge positively.
In order for a child to develop wholesome healthy self-esteem and pride, they must be immersed in true unconditional love. They must be trained and raised with love. Their love tanks must be filled with true unconditional parental love so that they fill their love tank with parental love. Without parental unconditional love and genuine love and help, children cannot have rich and wholesome healthy self-esteem and pride.
A child’s future and success depend on his parents’ true unconditional love.
The following is an example of a question-and-answer on Internet pediatric and adolescent health counseling on “I think I lack self-esteem”.
Q&A. I think she lacks self-esteem.
Q.My child is a 10-year-old girl, and I’m worried because she doesn’t seem to have any pride.
What should I do?
Thank you.
Youngkyung
That’s a good question.
See information on nurturing healthy self-esteem in children above.
If you have any further questions, please contact us.
Thank you.
Lee Sang-won, MD.
자녀가 건강한 자존감을 키울 수 있도록 도와주세요
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사진 3-239. 진정한 무조건적인 사랑을 충분히 받으며 자란 아이는 자신뿐 아니라 타인도 사랑하고, 무엇을 하든 최선을 다합니다. 어릴 때부터 건강한 자존감과 자긍심, 자신감을 가지고 성장합니다.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
성공한 사람이란 누구일까요?
부모와 형제자매가 화목하고 편안하게 하늘을 바라보고 세상을 바라보며, 부끄러움 없이 온화하고 선하며 예의 바르고 겸손하게 살아가며, 자녀들이 건강한 자존감과 자긍심을 가지고 타인을 사랑하며 사회에 기여하는 생산적인 구성원이 될 수 있도록 키우는 사람입니다.
풍족한 음식과 옷, 편안한 주거 환경에서 건강하고 생산적인 삶을 사는 것을 성공한 사람이라고 정의할 수 있을까요?
세상에 그런 사람이 얼마나 될까요?
모든 부모는 소중한 자녀가 성공적인 삶을 살기를 간절히 바랍니다.
하지만 성공하는 것은 그렇게 쉬운 일이 아닙니다.
“성공한 사람들”의 삶 전체를 살펴보면, 그들의 성공에는 한두 가지 공통점이 있습니다.
그들은 건강했고, 타고난 두뇌를 가졌으며, 열심히 공부하고, 무엇을 하든 최선을 다했으며, 좋은 대인관계를 유지했고, 어떤 일을 하든 시작하기 전에 좋은 계획을 세우고 체계적으로 잘 실행했습니다.
그리고 그 결과 성공적으로 마무리했습니다.
또한, 삶의 우선순위를 잘 정하고 그에 따라 일을 잘 수행했습니다.
게다가, 성장 과정에서 부모님으로부터 조건 없는 진정한 사랑을 받았을 뿐만 아니라, 성인이 되어서도 부모님의 사랑을 계속 받고 배우자, 자녀, 그리고 다른 사람들을 사랑하는 법을 배우며, 풍족한 경제력과 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 가지고 있습니다.
맞습니다.
성장기 아이들에게 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 갖는 것이 얼마나 중요한지 쉽게 알 수 있습니다.
건강한 자존감과 자부심이 얼마나 강한지가 이 세상에서 성공할 수 있는지를 결정합니다.
부모의 진실하고 무조건적인 사랑으로 자란 아이들은 건강한 자존감과 자부심, 그리고 강인함을 가지고 행복하게 성장합니다.
부모는 아이들이 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 갖고 성공할 수 있도록 어릴 때부터 많은 것을 해 줄 수 있습니다.
그중 가장 중요한 것은 조건 없는 진정한 사랑을 충분히 주는 것입니다.
부모는 사랑스러운 눈맞춤, 적절한 신체 접촉, 집중적인 관심과 보살핌, 그리고 사랑을 통해 아이들의 사랑의 탱크를 가득 채워주어야 합니다.
그래야만 아이들은 태어나서 신생아, 유아기, 학령기, 사춘기, 그리고 성인이 될 때까지 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 가지고 다른 사람을 사랑하는 법을 알고, 다른 사람에게 사랑받으며, 새롭거나 어려운 일에 직면했을 때 두려워하지 않게 됩니다.
건강한 자존감과 자부심을 가진 사람은 아름다운 삶을 살고, 예의 바르고 겸손하게 살며, 성공적인 삶을 살 수 있습니다.
이러한 이유로 부모는 자녀에게 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 가지고 살아가는 법을 가르쳐야 합니다. 자녀가 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 갖도록 양육하십시오.
사진 3-240. 눈맞춤, 신체 접촉, 진정한 무조건적인 사랑을 충분히 받으며 자란 아이는 자신뿐 아니라 타인도 사랑하고 무엇을 하든 최선을 다합니다. 어릴 때부터 건강한 자존감, 자부심, 자신감을 가지고 살아왔습니다.
저작권 ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
자신의 가치와 능력을 건전하고 높이 평가하고, 느끼고, 판단하는 것이 바로 자부심입니다.
건강한 자존감과 자부심을 가진 사람은 누구나 ‘나’라는 존재가 있고, ‘나는 이 세상에 비할 데 없는 존재’라고 말할 수 있습니다.
이러한 건강한 자존감과 자부심은 어린이와 어른 모두의 삶에서 매우 중요합니다.
인생의 성공은 건강한 자존감과 자부심이 얼마나 강하고 확고한지에 달려 있습니다.
하지만 여전히 많은 사람들이 건강한 자존감이 무엇인지 모르고 살아갑니다.
건강한 자존감이 풍부한 아이들은 다른 사람을 사랑하는 법을 알고, 또 다른 사람에게서 사랑을 받는 법도 압니다.
건강한 자존감은 삶에 필수적인 요소입니다.
건강한 자존감이 풍부한 사람은 무엇을 하든 최선을 다함으로써 삶에 안정감을 느낍니다.
새로운 상황에 직면했을 때 두려워하거나 겁먹지 않습니다.
새로운 문제를 해결하려는 확고한 마음가짐을 갖고, 자연스럽게 문제 해결에 임합니다.
반대로, 건강하지 않거나 손상된 자존감을 가진 사람, 또는 건강한 자존감이 없는 사람은 다른 사람을 사랑하는 법도 모르고, 사랑을 받는 법도 모릅니다.
그들은 일상생활에서 무력감을 느끼고, 낯선 사람과의 만남을 두려워하며, 새로운 일을 시작하는 것을 주저합니다. 시작은 할 수 있지만, 그 과정을 지속하는 데 어려움을 느낍니다.
학교 공부의 효율성과 성취도는 건강한 자존감이 얼마나 풍부한지에 달려 있습니다. 또한 성장과 성숙도에도 큰 영향을 미칩니다. 또래 및 친구들과 친밀한 관계를 맺고 다른 사람들과 대인관계를 형성하는 데에도 많은 영향을 줍니다.
사진 3-241. 눈맞춤 사랑, 신체 접촉 사랑, 그리고 무조건적인 진정한 사랑을 충분히 받으며 자란 아이는 어릴 때부터 눈맞춤이 잘 되고 건강한 자존감과 자신감을 가지고 자랍니다.
Copyright ⓒ 2012 John Sangwon Lee, MD., FAAP
뿐만 아니라, 건강한 자존감은 건강한 삶의 방향을 설정하는 데에도 큰 영향을 미칩니다.
아이들이 자존감의 기복을 겪는 것은 정상적인 현상입니다.
부모로부터 충분한 진정한 무조건적인 사랑을 받으며 자란 아이들은 자존감이 강합니다.
그래서 주변 사물을 보고, 만지고, 느끼고, 생각하며, 그것들이 무엇인지 느끼면서 배웁니다.
건강한 자존감을 가진 학령기 아동과 청소년은 낯선 사람을 두려워하지 않고, 크게 의심하지 않으며, 쉽게 받아들이고 편안하게 대합니다. 또한 자신의 감정이나 생각에 대해 궁금한 점이 있으면 주저 없이 질문하고 더 자세히 알아보고 싶어 합니다.
이들은 호기심이 매우 강합니다.
이러한 성격은 건강한 자존감을 가진 학령기 아동, 청소년, 그리고 성인에게서 흔히 볼 수 있습니다.
라
빨래하는 법, 청소하는 법, 청구서 정리하는 법, 수표(개인 수표) 사용하는 법, 쓰레기 버리는 법, 요리하는 법 등을 가르쳐줍니다.
이러한 것들을 가르쳐주는 것이죠.
이렇게 교육받은 아이들은 정신적으로나 신체적으로 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 키울 수 있습니다.
만약 아무것도 모른다면 당연히 모든 것을 두려워하게 되겠죠.
음주, 흡연, 중독성 물질 남용이 신체, 정신, 그리고 사회생활 전반에 부정적인 영향을 미친다는 것을 가르쳐주고, 이러한 행위에 관여하지 않도록 합니다.
자녀의 학교생활, 생활, 그리고 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 어떻게 키워나가는지 알아보기 위해 자녀의 선생님과 자주 만나 소통하세요.
부모님이나 외동 자녀가 지역에서 열리는 다양한 행사, 스포츠, 연극, 콘서트 등에 참여하고, 봉사활동을 통해 건강한 자부심을 키울 수 있도록 도와주세요.
학습실 환경과 조건은 학생들이 열심히 공부할 수 있도록 적절하게 조성되어야 하며, 학생들은 정해진 시간에 규칙적으로 숙제, 예습, 복습을 해야 합니다. 또한, 공부할 때는 정해진 범위 내에서 질문에 답하는 것을 돕되, 아이들을 대신해서 숙제를 해 주어서는 안 됩니다. 이는 학원에서 공부하는 것보다 스스로 공부하는 방법을 가르치는 것입니다.
자녀가 도서관, 중고등학교, 대학교, 또는 주일학교에서 배우고 건강한 자존감을 키울 수 있도록 하십시오.
자녀의 형제자매, 친척, 이웃과 자녀를 비교하는 말은 절대 하지 마십시오.
자녀를 다른 아이들과 비교하는 것은 자녀가 부모보다 낫고 부모는 자녀보다 못하다는 것을 암시합니다. 부모의 마음은 물론 자녀의 건강한 자존감과 자존심에 얼마나 큰 상처를 줄까요?
자녀가 스스로 할 수 없다고 해서 부모가 모든 것을 대신해 주어서는 안 됩니다.
자녀는 부모의 도움 없이도 스스로 할 수 있는 일이 많습니다. 부모는 종종 자녀가 할 수 없다고 단정짓지만, 시작조차 하지 않는 경우가 많습니다. 어떤 부모들은 성인이 된 아들과 딸에게도 이런 일을 강요합니다.
만약 당신이 자라면서 스스로 아무것도 해본 적이 없다고 가정해 보세요. 얼마나 슬픈 일일까요?
그런 부모의 양육 방식에 얽매여 자란 성인들에게서 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 찾을 수 있을까요?
그런 부모 밑에서 자란 아이가 어떻게 홀로 세상을 살아가며 굳건한 자긍심을 가질 수 있을까요?
그런 부모 밑에서 자란 아이들은 자신의 뿌리가 어디에서 왔는지 배우고, 자신의 뿌리에 자부심을 느끼도록 가르침을 받음으로써 자존감을 키울 수 있습니다.
풍부하고 건강한 자존감은 아이들의 성장과 발달, 그리고 성공에 필수적이며, 가정이나 학교에서의 일상생활, 학업, 운동 능력, 또래 관계에 긍정적인 영향을 미칩니다. 부모의 사랑이 얼마나 중요한지 쉽게 알 수 있습니다.
또한, 건강한 자존감은 흡연, 약물 남용, 음주, 십대 임신과 같은 유혹을 멀리하게 하고, 스스로에게 도전하여 무언가를 올바르게 해낼 수 있도록 하며, 호감 가는 성격과 긍정적인 판단력을 기르도록 도와줍니다.
아이가 건전하고 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 키우려면 진정한 무조건적인 사랑에 흠뻑 젖어 있어야 합니다. 사랑으로 양육하고 교육해야 하며, 아이의 사랑 탱크를 부모의 진정한 무조건적인 사랑으로 채워주어야 아이 또한 부모의 사랑 탱크를 채울 수 있습니다. 부모의 무조건적인 사랑과 진정한 사랑, 그리고 도움 없이는 아이는 풍부하고 건전하며 건강한 자존감과 자부심을 가질 수 없습니다.
아이의 미래와 성공은 부모의 진정한 무조건적인 사랑에 달려 있습니다.
다음은 인터넷 소아청소년 건강 상담 사이트에서 “자존감이 부족한 것 같아요”라는 질문과 답변의 예입니다.
질문과 답변: 아이가 자존감이 부족한 것 같아요.
질문: 제 아이는 10살 여자아이인데, 자존감이 전혀 없는 것 같아 걱정입니다.
어떻게 해야 할까요?
감사합니다.
영경
좋은 질문입니다.
위의 아이의 건강한 자존감 형성에 대한 정보를 참고하세요.
추가 문의사항이 있으시면 언제든지 연락 주십시오.
감사합니다.
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